Rebellion . Dissent . Protest . Unrest . Every teenage story inevitably revolves around these four forms of “ political protest” . The sullen teenager is almost always at odds with his parents . Yes , The above proposition is pretty much authentic ( you are hearing from a 19 year!) Here ia A mother’s guide to steer clear of the teenage tumult.
Lending a hearing Ear:
“Teenage dreams”,Katy Perry’s hit single celebrated the teenager by vividly exalting the dreams of a teenager . Perry’s voice resonated rhapsodically with the masses – so did the teenager’s . Do you hear your teenager’s voice ?
A STRANGE AGE – THE TEENAGE :
Teenage is a strange age. Maturity and immaturity have not surpassed one another .They still mingle , preventing one another from crossing that threshold when the proverbial bird -finally -flies -out -of -its -nest . I for one am on that very brink . Teenage is rather like “ brinkmanship”. ( a term in international politics , where two sides are often on the brink of a deadly nuclear conflict .Each side forces the other to make concessions or back down to prevent the fatal escalation – in our case a deadly confrontation between the teenager and the adult !)
THE TESTIMONY OF TEENAGE MOTHERS :
Anita ghosh , mother of a pair of teenagers , Shreya and Raghav says she had to deal with double the “ teenage tumult!”When teenagers cross the 15 year thresh hold they tend to become more obstinate and rebellious .They want to make independent decisions. “this is a breezy age , they want to emulate adult behaviour as fast as they can ,” says Anita.
“Once my son entered his teens , I pledged to befriend him”, says Niharika Sharma , mother of 16 year old Aryan . “ I managed to enter ( note : she says “enter “not “ intrude” ) my son’s teenage world , now I can guide him both as a friend as well as a parent.”16 year old Aryan’s side of the story is not very different . “ I feel comfortable sharing most things with mom . I draw on mom’s experience as a teenager to shape my own decisions ( he acknowledges the fact that his mom has worn the “ teenage shoes”) , it is of great help !
THE DUAL :
Only yesterday , while travelling in a metro I witnessed a “ dual”between a feisty teenager and her mother . it unfolded in the following sequence :
TEENAGER :“You don’t know me , you don’t want to know me , you never will!
FEISTY TEENAGER :Oh god ! Please mom , don’t pretend , you are quarter of a century older than me , hence you simply CANNOT know me better than I know myself !
MOTHER :I may be quarter of a century older , “generation gap”as you and your friends ceaselessly call it , but this “generation gap “ also entails 25 years of knowledge and experience
FEISTY TEENAGER :You mean outdated experience and knowledge . Probably would have benefited me in the 1980s , mom it’s 2020 . Please don’t whisk me back to the 80s .
END OF CONVERSATION .
Yes often such refutations end just like this – blankly because your teenage off spring just won’t listen .
MOTHER KNOWS BEST :
We know that , just don’t say it too often .
Tangled , a Walt Disney production gave to the world a wonderful sound track “ Mother Knows Best” by Donna Murphy , which resonated as a a totem of parental control . Mother Gothel retorts to each of princess rapunzul ‘s bids to escape the tower with the epithet “mother knows best .”Donna Murphy Sings “ trust me pet , mother knows best ,listen to your mother , it’s a scary world out there , one way or another something will go wrong out there I swear , ruffians , quicksand ,poison ivy , thugs,
If this is the method you use to “ warn your teenager” you are inviting trouble . Let them live the experience and make their decisions!
A LESSON WELL LEARNT :
Best lesson to learn – “parents put on the teenage shoes, tie those laces tightly , your teenager needs you , as much as they may deny that fact , only play the role of sir Oracle with immense caution to prevent dire consequences !”